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Breakfast is ready


Cold Cereals:- AllBran, Muesli, Shredded Wheat, CornFlakes, Triple Berry Oatmeal Crisp, Cocoa Pops


Hot Cereal: Porridge

In the warmers:- bacon, ham, turkey sausages, omelette, boiled eggs, hash browns, grilled tomatoes, grilled mushrooms, Boston baked beans


Toast, croissants, bagels, Danish pastries,

Jam, jellies, marmalade, Marmite

Tea, coffee, juices



Enjoy



see you all later




s
xxx

Hy Sylvia,

Thanks for the lovely breakfast - just what I needed Xxx

SO very sorry to hear about your friend and her illness - it is really awful.

It is always difficult to know what to say in these circumstances, especially as there is nothing you can so to help. All you can do is to keep in touch with her, try to be as cheerful as you can, without 'going over the top', and just make sure that she feels she can talk to you and that you will 'listen'. Her husband will need this too, even more so!

I am sure you will do just that.

Best wishes to you all,

Dea x

Another lovely breakfast from Sylvia. Thank you.


So very sorry about your friend Sylvs. Sometimes there just aren't the words to express how one feels at times like this. I hope your friend and her husband have a loving circle of family and friends around them to support them during this difficult time. Much love to you too of course.


Trouble is, the older one gets, the smaller our circle of old friends becomes which, I suppose is only natural sadly.


Today we should be going to the funeral of a friend who was an usher at our wedding but the distance and timing are all wrong for OH's meds/food etc. We will be thinking of his wife and family though.



It's pouring down here and has been for a while - a really wet day. Cue for ironing I suppose!


Must away for my shower.......or should I just stand outside in the rain?? On second thoughts........maybe not!

Sylvia
I have been thinking about your friend and what her husband said.

I think he is saying

do and say the things you would have said if you did not know she was ill.
Talk about plans for the future
Anticipation of reunion
How you are both feeling for the day etc

In other words you will have to put it to the back of your mind even though it hurts. She may have more inkling than her husband knows.

OMG....what a terrible night for you all. Doom and gloom

Its tough to know what to do when your friend doesnt know the prognosis Sylv

No doubt she has a good idea and may well be keeping quiet to help everyone else out?


The five stages of grief according to Kubler Ross;


1.Denial – "I feel fine."; "This can't be happening, not to me."
Denial is usually only a temporary defense for the individual. This feeling is generally replaced with heightened awareness of positions and individuals that will be left behind after death.

2.Anger – "Why me? It's not fair!"; "How can this happen to me?"; "Who is to blame?"
Once in the second stage, the individual recognizes that denial cannot continue. Because of anger, the person is very difficult to care for due to misplaced feelings of rage and envy. Any individual that symbolizes life or energy is subject to projected resentment and jealousy.

3.Bargaining – "Just let me live to see my children graduate."; "I'll do anything for a few more years."; "I will give my life savings if..."
The third stage involves the hope that the individual can somehow postpone or delay death. Usually, the negotiation for an extended life is made with a higher power in exchange for a reformed lifestyle. Psychologically, the individual is saying, "I understand I will die, but if I could just have more time..."

4.Depression – "I'm so sad, why bother with anything?"; "I'm going to die... What's the point?"; "I miss my loved one, why go on?"
During the fourth stage, the dying person begins to understand the certainty of death. Because of this, the individual may become silent, refuse visitors and spend much of the time crying and grieving. This process allows the dying person to disconnect oneself from things of love and affection. It is not recommended to attempt to cheer up an individual who is in this stage. It is an important time for grieving that must be processed.

5.Acceptance – "It's going to be okay."; "I can't fight it, I may as well prepare for it."
In this last stage, the individual begins to come to terms with his mortality or that of his loved one.


You need to find out which stage she is at before you can help her.

Id talk to her and ask her how she is feeling and let her chat away...Im sure she must know her prognosis and is just not talking about it

My thoughts are with you at this very difficult and sad time.

A friend of mine died of stomach cancer three years ago this Christmas....she was 27

Loz got the news of her illness in May and died 27th Dec.

She went through all the 5 stages of grief very quickly and she accepted her fate more easily and sooner than we did

We talked and planned her funeral. She told us she didn’t want anyone going to see her in the funeral home and that she wanted to be remembered as she was in life

She was cremated in her netball kit and had her fav songs played in church

We celebrated Loz's life and talked about all the stoopid stuff she used to do...her party piece was showing her arse at every opportunity....even on her wedding photos in the Sept marriage before her death!

Your friend needs to talk even if her husband doesn’t realise it. In fact he is more than likely in the Denial stage himself, poor thing.

MIL was in denial right up to the day she died.
FIL called us up in November as she had detiorated.
By the time we got up there she had improved and was upset that we had been called.
She got through Christmas and lasted till early March,
I sat with her holding her hand and talking to her until the end.
That was a privillege.
She had been ill for years and really did not want to know.

As Ginny says Let her be your guide.

Ginny for you

http://www.genesreunited.co.uk/boards.asp?wci=thread&tk=1248043

Noooo is this me being all serious, I dont like serious

Sylvs....so glad you put Marmite out today and not that bl##dy Oz stuff


Right, I fink I need a shower and a little think about Loz and her arse...it was a fabulous arse too ;)

Zippity doo da........runs upstairs to stick the shower

LK....PMd her ER results for Harvey

Thanks hun.

and another

http://www.genesreunited.co.uk/boards.asp?wci=thread&tk=1248032

Sylvia

I think that Ginny has written some very good pointers on how to treat her and what to say

I know if it was me - thats exactly like to be treated ---

Gins - what a memory Loz left to you all - how will any of you ever forget her and her - party piece

Bless

Renes

Will never forget Loz...she was even more nuts than me

She always wore a thong so when she did her party peice everyone got an eye full!

LK

I cant do an ER for someone born in 1881!

But the info required was for after 1928Gins. He was even looking at possible death in 1952

If he was born in 1881 he will not be on the ER for 2003 - 2010...you numpty!

Sorry I did not realise you only had limited dates

I found my great grand parents on one for 1030 something but I knew roughly where they were.

Wow....you found ER results for 1030....clever girl ;)

So, if LK's gt.grandparents were on the electoral roll for 1030, then that makes LK not just middle aged but positively medieval!



I wish it would stop raining now. Had enough of it.