General Chat

As you know we had the inquest earlier this afternoon. The coroner was a lady, and she was so lovley, and tried her very best to put us at ease. There were 2 medical people there, one being the specialist who had dealt with Mum prior to her op, and who actually performed the op to repair her hiatus hernia. The other one was the pathologist who carried out the post mortem.

We opted to just have a summary of the post mortem which was enough really. The upshot of it all is that when the op was done, they found that 2/3rds of Mum's stomach had been pushed up into her gullet, hence the severe problems she was experiencing. Although the op went very well, and she was sent home the day after, there was a large void left which filled with fluid. That was when she was readmitted to hospital. She was treated with antibiotics and a lot of the fluid was drained off making her much more comfortable, and on the road to recovery, as we all thought, including the doctors at the hospital.

Basically, in the early hours of March 25th, she suffered a massive bleed into the space below her lungs, so much so that her haemoglobin levels dropped dramtically, and there was not enough blood being pumped around her body to keep her heart going. Hence she suffered a cardiac arrest, and although they did all they could, there really was no way back.

The conclusion is that if Mum had not had the op, she would still be here now, but her quality of life was getting so bad with her gastric problems, she really felt she had no option but to go for the op with the risks that entailed. We all knew that she had thought about it all long and hard, so it was her choice.

The good thing is (if there is such a thing in these circumstances) that there was no neglect on the part of the hospital and the staff or the care she received, and she really would not have suffered in her passing, it was so quick.

We are feeling somewhat numb at the moment as it's all come back to the fore again, but at least we can draw a line under everything, and hopefully move on with our lives. I know that Mum would not want us to be sad, and when I think of what she bore throughout her life, we have to hope for her own strength of character to see us onwards and upwards.

I hope this doesn't seem too rambley. I just wanted you all to know, and to say a huge thank you for the love and support you have shown. It does mean so much. A few hugs wouldn't go astray though. I think it will be an early night, and hopefully will feel a bit better again tomorrow.

PP
xx

I am so sorry to hear about this but hope that knowing the truth will bring you peace.

Sue
xx

Sending ((((((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))))))

xxx

sending you hugs,
and i hope they help,

i hope also that your mam visits you while you rest and sleep and lets you know that shes ok now, and gives you a hug from her,
to remember shes around you all the time, may help you,
thinking of you

Must have been traumatic for you,bringing it all back.
She is at peace now and no more suffering.
Love and Hugs

Brenda x x

(((((hugs))))) for you Pauline. at least you now know and can have closure. she doesn't have to suffer any more and can rest in peace.

ann
Glos

{{{{{{{{{ hugs }}}}}}}}}

It must have been a really traumatic day for you all,
I'm sure your mum would have wanted you all to be able to move on now.X

Hello Pauline,

I hope you don't mind me adding cos I'm sure we haven't spoken before,

just wanted to add my best wishes to you & your family.

Maria x

(((((((((((((hug )))))))))))
Just for you
Jenxx

PP, it must have been sad to hear all that information but as it has given you some peace of mind that your mum was treated as well as possible, and no neglect or mistakes made, as you say, you can draw a line under it all. You can now grieve for your Mum as if she had just gone to sleep and left you because her time had come. You will be together sometime, I always take comfort imagining my loved ones going to be with other family members. After my cousin died recently, at the funeral his daughter said it helped her to think of him with his parents and my Mum and Aunt, who were his favourite Aunts, with my Mum handing round cake and sausage rolls. It was a family thing that Mum always provided the s.rolls, mince pies and cakes for any family get together, you were not allowed to leave when visiting till you had eaten and had a cuppa, and usually a piece of cake to take with you too.
Hope you have little things like that which will bring comfort.

Lizx

Thank you so much for your kind words. Yesterday was a bad day, but today I feel much better again, and able to face the world. I know there will be good days and bad ones going forward, but time does ease the pain I know.

We are off for a weekend in our caravan to meet up with some friends. I think that will do us all good.

Thanks again for your support.

PP
xx

All the best to you Pauline, and hope the caravan weekend goes well.

I have suffered from a hiatus hernia for years, and cant eat some foods. So this came as a shock to me, to know what could happen.

Mo

Enjoy your weekend away, it will do you good and take your mind off things, and I hope your dear Mum manages to help arrange good weather lol
Lizx