General Chat

Frank where was the click in Ros's leg?Hip,Knee ?.I hope is doesn't happen again.
Trust you to put yourself in the doghouse lol.She was probably enjoying doing her sewing and having the TV turned up :-D
Bad though of the Nurse not to apologise to you for the long wait :-S
I find that the cashiers on hte till in the supermarket say sorry to keep you waiting (even if they haven't !!!!!) I think they have just been told to say it.

That was sad news Gill.I assume he was an elderly gentleman.Did your OH actually know him or was it just through doing the family tree?
I think that is a lovely idea to email the drain people.They might put up your letter on their review bit on line if they have one (the one with comments from customers)
It make me laugh everytime to say you are going to start wrapping Michelles presents,because you come back laterans say you still haven't managed to get them done :-D :-D :-D.At least you have PLENTY of time lol

Yikes Mel it must have been heavy rain for everyone to clog up the doorway like that.Was that in Bideford?So far we have had no rain but it is forecast here from about 6pm.I bet the cat will come in then .The decorator has finished and gone .It all looks so much nicer now.He said all the wood looks in good nick ,so nothing rotten .He also said he has never seen such clean window frames and sills(upstairs).That is because our window cleaner does them at the same time as the windows every 2 months.
I must remember to tell him next time he comes.

I think we are all wondering how things have gone today with Anns' MIL.I hope she still isn't waiting for hospital transport or ambulance to take her home !!!!!!.She won't be a happy bunny if thats the case.It will be such a stressful for day for them all and no doubt Ann and Gordon will be home tonight dreading that phone ringing :-S :-S

We have spent the last almost 3 years trying to find out if we are legible for a refund for my Mums nursing costs.it is a right old rigmarole .We had yet another letter today from Devon Health Authority apologising for the delay and will keep us informed every 6 months as to how the claim is going !!!!!!!!.Chris has now just done a letter to the home she was in to see if they can give us details of Mum's monthly payments.
Just before we knew that we could make a claim I destroyed all the old paperwork as after 7 years thought there would be no need to keep things.It is now 10 years since Mum died.

Well I don't believe it.The sun is coming out !!..I think it will be a fleeting visit though (if the forecast is right for tonight).
Last night I slept really well until 3.30 when you know who woke me.I then let him out and went back to sleep until 5am when I heard a right old racket going on .It sounded like a group of youngsters making their way down the road all shouting and laughing and I think trying to pull over some recycling bins

:-| :-|.Then at 6am Next doors dog was barking .Oh yes and then there was the deer 'barking'.Hopefully tonight it might be a bit more peaceful (other than Thomas at his usual time.

Thanks Mel for your PM I've replied. Looks like we've got your rain now, it's just started and is getting heavier. Poor OH is going to get wet coming home from work. I think I'll have a hot bath ready for him when he gets in. All the bedding has been washed and I manage to dry it on the line before the rain started so I'm pleased with that.

My OH's relatives were 76 and 78 for his wife, so not a bad age Frank. He was a lovely man and very helpful with our tree, I'm going to miss him. Not looking forward to having to tell OH later :-(

Yes I'm looking forward to having time off from selling our property, it's been so long it's become normal for me. OH and I are getting on much better now there's less stress in our lives and having the drains fixed too has helped. Especially now it's raining. I dread to think what sort of mess would of been out there if they hadn't of been fixed.

Right, back to my OH's tree again now, I've managed to find 10 more people so far and have also found some tree match's on Genes too, just waiting for replies to the messages I've sent now.

Enjoy your pork filet Frank. Hope things have gone alright for Ann's MIL today. I'm sure she'll let us know soon <3

Afternoon All,

Oh Frank, what a morning you've had! I hope flopping in your chair has helped and I imagine a bit of a break with Martine may have cheered Ros up.

We went to OH's bank appointment early this morning and I must say we were most impressed with the service! :-) He is switching his bank to them and should be at least £500 a year better off by doing so. Now he's wishing he'd done it years ago......I did tell him ages ago, but he just expects things to go wrong!! :-S Also, instead of going into the city or Nuneaton, he can do most banking at our Post Office in the village which is much more convenient as our Post Office is in one of our 2 Co*op stores. :-)

MIL's not home yet! Since lunchtime OH's been at his mum's waiting for her to be brought home and he says it's been a long afternoon now! He's got the cleaning, washing and shopping help reinstated and notified the Macmillan nurse, so that is good and also paid some of her bills. He's also contacted the home and his dad is still upset and fretting about MIL. He daren't risk bringing him to the house and doesn't think MIL will be well enough to go and see him at the home. The car could be in an awful state if she's ill, as to put it bluntly it's from both ends at once. Not sure I would want to travel in the car afterwards either. The neighbours have told OH today that they will look in on her to see she's ok and have been very good. We'll have to think of a suitable gift for them for all they've done/are doing to help.

I hope your fascias and soffits are looking good now Jane......what's next? lol.

Gill I bet it will be a relief to have a break from your place being up for sale. I hope your appreciation gets fed back to the workmen. I bet it will as things like that encourage them to carry on the same way with other customers which is what their boss will want! :-) Shame about your husband's rellie passing away, but it does often follow that a remaining partner dies soon after the other.

Just for info, and it's something I was interested in as I didn't know, I looked up about council banding and home improvements and it seems that since they changed to council tax from the old rates system in 1991, you can do extensions, change conservatories to sunrooms, add rooms (up to a limit) and subject to any planning/building regs without any effect on your council tax or banding. When you sell your house in the future, they apply the effect of any changes to readjust your council tax banding then and any increase is applied for the new owners that move in. Something to watch out for when you buy another house that's had alterations too.

Liz, I watched our recording of the £100,000 house last night. I think I would have wanted a bit of paint on the drab ceilings to lighten them up! How brilliant that they had no cost and were in pocket with the utilities though and I liked the look of the outside. I liked the idea of the indoor swing they showed at another house. :-D

You didn't get much sleep last night did you Jane. I didn't see your post till after I'd posted mine. You did make me laugh about Michelle's presents, but it's true, each time I decide to do them I end up doing something else. At this rate I'll be wrapping them up the day before she gets here LOL, or worse still on the day :-D.

The relative lives in New Zealand, so we never actually got to meet him, but have been in contact with him via email for well over 10 years. He was very helpful with our tree and between us we ended up with quite a few people. Over 2000 for us and 3000 for him.

I helped him with this side of the family as he wasn't sure where to start looking for the UK records and as for us trying to find the NZ ones that wasn't easy either, so he helped us with those........We helped each other.

He did give me access to his tree but unfortunately had his living relatives hidden as do I so that's why I don't have as many as him. My mum isn't keen on her details being on show, that's is fair enough. Which is why all my living relatives are now hidden.

Well, I'd better get back to the tree before my soaps start and the Great British Bake Off, Sandra and I are really looking forward to that and it finishes just as OH is coming in from work, so timed just right :-D :-D

Each time I post I've missed someone else :-S :-S

Thanks for the info on the council tax banding I didn't know that.....something to think about if we ever buy somewhere else Ann.

I bet your OH is really fed up waiting now. Has he rang the hospital maybe they will be able to let him know what time his mum is being sent home. It's getting a bit late so it might be tomorrow now and he doesn't want to sit around if she's not coming home today. Glad to hear he's sorting his bank out. It sounds as if it's going to be so much easier for him now.

What a nice idea to buy a gift for your MIL's neighbours, that would be the kind of thing I'd do. Have you got anything in mind?

Well, I'd better go and sort out dinner, I didn't realise the time
BBL

Oh Ann
Still not home !!!!..I had a feeling this might happen.Has OH rung the hospital to make sure that she is still being sent home?? From what you say about possible problems from 'both ends' I really cant' see it working of she is going to be stuck in her bed ,waiting for help to come in .She might be in a right old mess for hours.To me it sounds as though she needs to be in a nursing home or Hospice now.Not at home.
Poor FIL .There is no way he should go back to the house and also the less conversation about MIL is the best thing.It sounds cruel to say that ,but for his sake that is the best thing.His mind is in total confusion bless him :-( and any talk of MIL at the moment is just going to make things worse I feel..When someone is like FIL it is quite easy to just switch the conversation to something else.eg those old photos of the planes(I think it was planes !)
I think your MIL's neighbours will probably get quite a shock ,but it is lovely that they have said they will help out.
Must go and put the oven on .

Ann we also watched a programme about the John Franklin expedition to find the North West passage in 1847. It was absolutely fascinating as a Canadian team have found HMS Erebus, and now believe that the ship was actually sailed much closer to the North American coast than was at first thought . If you didn't see it do try to, as it was riveting.
Mucky old day here, no rain, but chilly and windy.

OH did ring the hospital earlier Gill and they just said it would be later in the afternoon. Now the hospital has just rung here to say that it will be at least another hour. They have suggested to MIL that she is discharged in the morning instead, but she's making a fuss and has told them to ring OH to go and fetch her!! He's been at her house since lunchtime and had no food and she wants him to drive another 40 odd miles now. Plus he'd have to fit her and her wheelchair in the car somehow as well as it's too big for the boot!! :-S He's not happy about it and is ringing them back as he feels she needs to go in the ambulance with being so frail. The staff nurse said she was reticent about her going by car as well. :-S

Ann ,he must say to leave it until tomorrow.If she comes home tonight he will be staying with her all night !!!!!! and will have no back up.This is all sounding terribly wrong to me :-S :-S

I'm surprised the hospital are letting her go home, given what you've told us about her health now. Jane is right she needs more help and isn't going to get round the clock care at home.

My granddad wasn't allowed to go home when he was in hospital and had to agree to go to a care/nursing home before the hospital discharged him. I know it was a few years ago, but surely things haven't changed that much now. I hope things work out ok for everyone, but MIL going home doesn't seem the right thing for her to do....No matter how stubborn she is.
I agree with Jane on this situation, it doesn't sound right to me either and it's certainly not fair on you or your OH.

Maybe you could have a word with the doctor and see what he has to say, after all he has a duty of care to your MIL and if anything was to happen at home......Well, it doesn't bare thinking about. Some advice off the doctor might be a good idea, it can't do any harm to talk with him.

I agree 100% with what you say about both of them Jane. It sounds an awful thing to say, but without MIL I think we could deal with FIL much more easily. MIL's been told all the options for good care for her several times and it was spelled out to her that if she needs help it would be a paramedic she needs not family but her will to do as she pleases seems to overide her common sense! OH said some of the nurses clearly have doubts, but all the emphasis nowadays is on what the patient wants rather than what their needs are or what's really best for them, so everyone's hands are tied.

OH has rung me again....she's stopping there till in the morning, thank goodness. She tried lots of pleading and wheedling and in the next breath said she'd had violent diaorrhea at teatime (which the staff nurse didn't know about). OH stuck to his guns and told her all sorts needed to be set up how she wants and to be handy for her when she's home, like table lamp, phone etc and there wouldn't be time to do it tonight by the time she was home. Phew till tomorrow!

Ideas for gifts would be welcome Gill. :-) I just thought about a card and some gift vouchers they could treat themselves with. :-)

I'll see if I can find that prog on the iplayer Liz. It sounds good!

Phew Ann :-D...It would have been madness for her to go home tonight.
I hope Gordon is on his way home now and can get a decents night sleep in before whatever happens tomorrow .How ever difficult MIL is it will be so distressful for her if she is stuck in her bed and having diarrhea and having to sit in it for how ever long until a Carer arrives.I just can't see this working at all.

It seems silly that it's up to MIL as to weather she goes home or into a care home. Things have definitely changed over the years. At least she's not going home till tomorrow now so that must be a relief for your OH. I would still have a word with the doctor especially if she has an upset tummy. Is there anyway she could have a live in carer........I know she probably wouldn't like it but it would give you both peace of mind and would be the next best thing to going into a home if she's so set against it.

You asked for ideas for gifts. Do you know what sort of things they like? Are they into gardening, maybe you could get them a nice plant for the garden. Or take them out for a meal as a thank you, it would be nice for you and Gordon too and would give you all a break.

I hope you both have a good nights sleep. You must be so exhausted with it all? At this rate you two will end up ill, then where will you all be? Please take care <3

I am off to bed now..Have been banned to te spare room as I have shut Thomas in at 8 !!.Chris wants an undisturbed night :-D.I am quite happy with this arrangement lol as I can sit here in bed and watch TV and read my book ,then get up at then be woken with loves ,rubs and padding from Thomas at 3 30.Mind you it may be earlier since he will have been shut in for so long.His litter tray is in place down in the utility.

Ann relaxation tapes would be a good idea for you both tonight or some calming music to send you off to sleep.If you have anything like that I would just keep it running :-)
Night Night xx

Ann you must have had such a stressful day today. I really can't see how they can say MIL can go home if she wants. There will be such a mess to clear up if she has an accident and it can't be right to leave her in that condition all night or any time during the day till the next carer comes.

As you say you could both deal with FIL ok but MIL sounds such a strong willed ladyYou mentioned that her legs hurt when they were touched, that happened to my mum. when I washed her feet and held her ankles to lift them from the bowl she woudl say don't hole me so tight it hurts. I was'nt holding her tight at all. I really can't see how MIL will be able to cope at home at all. She will only end up back in hospital. I feel so sorry for you both.

The relaxation tapes Jane mentioned sound a good idea. Do try hard to relax a bit till tomorrow and I hope you both can sleep ok tonight. Love to you both <3 <3 <3 <3

I'm off to bed now, OH had his hot bath I'd run for him when he came in from work and it's relaxed him and made him tired. Maybe you could try that Ann, a nice hot bath it might relieve some of the stress. Hope you get a good nights sleep. See you all in the morning.
Night NIght

I've just been on another thread and someone has pointed out, which I'm sure we all know, that all these are public threads and are open to anyone and everyone to read and can in fact find their way onto Google!! It's really easy to find out from conversations where people live and every aspect of their lives. That is why I am careful over names and too much personal info particularly after the experience I had some couple of years ago! Fine in an email or pm but not on a public thread. Conversations between friends can in fact be read by anyone and everyone, and there are a lot of very mischievous and downright awful.people out there. Just thought I'd mention it!!!!

Morning Lix and all, Evening Kim.
#
HOME ALONE TODAY. Madam went of at 8.45 to meet up in the village car park, to go to the N.E.C. B'Ham. They have a minibus to see the quilting exhibition. She will be home around 6.00 pm.

Oh Ann, what can be said that's not already been said. Please try to get some rest for Gordon, he must be shattered with all this too and throwing, and not getting anywhere. Without sounding NASTY. I don't think MIL should be allowed home in these circumstances. You can just imagine how she would be if she had a body accident, and another accident trying to clean herself up. Social Services should step in and tell her in no uncertain terms, that she can't do as SHE PLEASES.

How did things go with my little friend last night Jane ??? The more I read about his antics the more I don't want another CAT !!!!

I see that CHILD HELP thingy has gone BUST. I wonder whose had fingers in the pie. It was a Multi-Million pound business, so what happened there, will we ever know ???

Was it yesterday you and Ann were meeting up for lunch Jane, or is it next week. ???

Gill, I suppose the old THREE SCORE AND TEN comes to mind about your relatives in N.Z. so they had a good innings.

Horrible morning here, rain showers VERY CLOUDY, so bad I have the lights on.

Off to get some breakfast and a coffee.

Morning all

Yes that's a good point Liz. I never put my personal life on here for that same reason. I always put things like that in a PM or email, it's just not worth the risk.

It's pouring with rain here today, not the type of thing you want to see first thing in the morning is it? Not sure we're going to get a decent summer this year :-(

I wonder how Ann and her OH are today, hope they both managed to get a decent nights sleep, it could be a long day today <3

Well, Jane, the presents are back out, so I'm about to start wrapping them again LOL..... Wish me luck :-D :-D
BBL

Morning Frank didn't see you there, so you've got the rain too, isn't it horrible all the time. I don't mind the rain but not every day, especially when it's suppose to be summer.

Yes the relatives had good innings, OH was a bit shocked when I told him. Although we'd never met him, he was a great character and was always ready to help with the family tree. By the amount of people he had on his tree he certainly enjoyed his hobby. He'll be sadly missed.

I think Ann and Jane are meeting up next Wednesday for lunch.

Going to grab a cuppa now then get on with this present wrapping.