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SENDING MESSAGES

ProfilePosted byOptionsPost Date

Kathryn

Kathryn Report 7 May 2012 18:50

Hi, don't know if anyone can help please. I have sent a few messages today to various members. Have just checked in my sent messages to see if anyone has replied. I notice that one of the messages sent now doesn't have an envelope beside it and the member has not replied. Does anyone know what this means please. The other messages I sent still have the envelopes beside the messages. Was wondering if this means that the other person has read the message and decided not to reply.

Any help would be greatfully appreciated.

Regards

Kathryn

+++DetEcTive+++

+++DetEcTive+++ Report 7 May 2012 18:55

If it has an envelope beside it, the message has not been read. Perhaps they are not actively involved in FH and no longer check, or are able to check, the site. A few hours is only a short time to be expecting replies!

The message where the envelope has disappeared means that it has been read. You'll have to be patient and wait and see if they reply. Don't get disheartened if they don't, but move on to other lines of enquiry/research

Island

Island Report 7 May 2012 18:56

Hi, when the message is opened the envelope no longer shows. Give the recipient time to respond.

Kathryn

Kathryn Report 7 May 2012 18:58

Thanks for your reply Detective, I thought that was the case that it had been read as the envelope had disappeared but wasn't sure. I know, I'm an impatient so and so.

Kind regards


Kathryn

Kathryn

Kathryn Report 7 May 2012 18:59

And thanks for yours Island.

Regards

Kathryn

Island

Island Report 7 May 2012 19:06

I've been waiting about seven years for one reply but it disappeared from my 'sent messages' during last years revamp :-S :-S

JustDinosaurJill

JustDinosaurJill Report 7 May 2012 19:08

It only means that your message has been opened. It doesn't mean that the recipient had decided not to reply.

It is true that some people you pm, never get back to you but the person might be taking time to create a reply, or even opened your message and then had to go dish up dinner.

If you never receive a reply it's basically tough. It's happened to us all. To be sure not even acknowledging your message, not even saying thanks if you've taken the time to help with their research not connected to your own (as I did recently because I live right by an old family house of interest to another GR), is bad manners but some people are like that. There's nothing you can do about it. It might come back to bite them on the bum though. Years ago in the age of snail mail, I was contacted by someone interested in a surname of mine. I replied with every scrap of info I had and asked questions in return. I heard nothing back and wrote a polite reminder. Still nothing until a few years afterwards when the same person contacted me asking for more info. By this time I did have some more but his loss because as the saying goes 'Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me'.

I always try to reply as soon as possible after I open a pm even if it's just to say I'll get back to them. But that is me.

I hope that you get the replies you are hoping for.

Jill



Island

Island Report 7 May 2012 19:17

I'm not sure who you are responding to Jillian but Kathryn only sent her messages today so it's a bit early to make a meal of it.

Kathryn

Kathryn Report 7 May 2012 19:17

Hi again, I know what you mean, some people don't even have the courtesy to just reply and say "I can't help, not related, or as you say have read your message and will reply soon". That gets to me also. Obviously we are all tarred with different brushes but I believe politeness or in a case like this just a short message saying as above, have read your message, no can help, not related or something. As I replied in an earlier message I am so impatient, was born like it. Obviously if I'm at work I can't reply until I get home in the evening as am not allowed to use the Internet at work other than searching work related matters. I always reply to messages even it it's just to say thanks for someones help.

Hey ho, my moan over for today, who knows what tomorrow will bring.

Regards

Kathryn

Kathryn

Kathryn Report 7 May 2012 19:20

Sorry Island, I understand what you are saying to Jillian but the things written about do happen. If I get a message I usually answer it straight away unless of course I'm at work even if it's just to say thanks or will reply soon.

By the way Island thank you once again for your input.

Regards

Kathryn

Kathryn

Kathryn Report 7 May 2012 19:22

Am off shortly to watch Eastenders, on at 7.30 tonight instead of 8pm. Then bath, work tomorrow but will come and check to see if anyone else has added to this thread.

Regards


Kathryn

JustDinosaurJill

JustDinosaurJill Report 7 May 2012 19:24

Island i was responding to Kathryn.

When I started to type my reply, there were no other replies to Kathryn's post.

Didn't realise I'd made a meal of it. I was giving an honest assessment that sometimes you get a reply and sometimes you don't but I did say it could just be that the person had opened the message to do other things.

Please don't read anything more in my reply than it actually says.

J

Kathryn

Kathryn Report 7 May 2012 19:24

Before I go I forgot to mention that I did ask the member to let me know either way, ie whether she could help or not.

Regards

Kathryn

Island

Island Report 8 May 2012 09:53

Jillian, I can assure you I have no desire to read anything into your reply.
As your post was some 12 minutes after the previous one it seemed fair to assume that you had seen the other posts so I saw no harm in asking to whom you were responding.

I wouldn't get too anxious over not receiving a reply on the same day and give the list of reasons we are all so familiar with.
I don't think it is fair to make assumptions about the person who did not respond immediately - Internet connections can, and do, break without notice as I know all too well. Then there is the contrary behaviour of GR itself. Give it time :-)