General Chat

Hello all

I've posted on Find Ancestors for the first time in quite a while.

It's been a hard couple of years for me after my hubby was diagnosed with dementia in 2023. It was vascular dementia but nothing like I'd experienced before - my mother, mother-in-law and brother-in-law all had the same diagnosis - but with Bob it was more his mobility and dexterity rather than his memory that was affected. Because of this he had a great number of falls and knocks to the head and after each one his mobility and dexterity were worse. It was very hard looking after him but luckily my son who still lives at home works for himself and gave up his work for a year to help look after his dad.

We actually all became much closer in the last year but unfortunately Bob died last July on his 77th birthday. It had been a really fast decline.

I haven't felt like posting before, although I have looked in now and then, but tonight there was a request for help on the Find Ancestors board so I thought I'd post.

I know there are not many posts these days but thought some of you may remember me. Hope everyone is well. My memory isn't brilliant these days but I do remember most of the people who post on the General Board.

I probably won't be on regularly but hope to post now and then.

Kath. x

God to see you Kathleen and yes I remember you. I am so sorry to hear of the sad time you had for a couple of years and hope that you are beginning to make a life for yourself without Bob. It is hard, You may remember that my OH died in 2021 and those four years have been hard but I have been helped by the friendship and 'company' of friends on here.
Do call in and see us occasionally

Good morning Kath, Yes I do remember you.

So sorry to hear of the loss of your husband and the tough time you had before that. How lovely that your son was able to share the caring with you.
Hard times do bring the family closer, we found too.

It's good that you feel ready to post again on the boards and I look forward to seeing your name more often, when you are able.

Hallo Kath, I remember you too. I’m very sorry to hear of the loss of your husband and the difficult times you have had. It’s good to see you back. Just come on and post when you feel able.

Good morning Kath, I remember you too :-)

So sorry to hear about the passing of your OH <3. It is never easy when you loose a loved one, the only consolation is that they are now free from those things that limited their quality of life and, I feel, are now in a far far better place <3

Don't be a stranger, Kath.. you will always be welcome :-)

I remember you as well, welcome back to the boards. I am sorry that you have had such a hard time <3

I remember you too. So sorry you have had such a difficult time, but you have a lovely son who gave up his work to help you. My FIL had vascular dementia and it took away his mobility too and meant he had a lot of falls. He also had Alzheimers but had been trotting upstairs till he was 92. He passed away at age 95, but was happy and still knew us which we were thankful for.

It will be good to see you posting again as and when you are able. Best wishes. :-)

I remember you as I have had your help many times with my research . So sorry to hear of your OH's passing <3

Hi everyone. Thank you all for your kind words.

These boards were very important to me when my mother died (22 years ago next Wednesday) as looking after her was a big part of my life then and Genes gave me a hobby doing family research when I didn't know what to do with the extra time I had on my hands.

My son and I are slowly getting used to being just the two of us. His work is coming back slowly which means he still has time to spend with me and I am so grateful for his company. We are slowly getting over the tiredness - I don't think either of us slept much in the year before Bob died as we were always listening out for him as he fell and hurt himself so often. We both spent the first couple of months falling asleep all day and I still fall asleep at the drop of a hat, but things are slowly improving. I have a couple of good friends who carried on visiting all through Bob's illness and still help now.

My concentration isn't great these days so I couldn't spend hours on here like I did when I first joined but I will pop on now and then.

Kath. x

Hi Kathleen, I also remember you.

I am sorry for your loss, but your son is a good help for you.

I am about 1 year into the dementia journey with my husband, who was diagnosed last summer. Other events caused him to be in hospital for 7 weeks, during which time we got the diagnosis. My daughter lives in another province but came and helped me.

Daughter and I decided that we could not continue in the house as I have mobility issues, so in 5 weeks we found a place with Accessible Living for me and Multi Level Car for OH, emptied the house and put it up for sale.

That is when I realised how tired I was after 2 years of watching out for him, beginning with forgetfulness and getting lost, although he always found his way back home.

Take your time, sleep as much as you need, keep contact with friends ................. and come back on here!

My condolences, Kathleen. ()

You are not alone. X

Hello Kath <3 <3

Hi Sylvia, Joy and Fly,

Thank you for responding.

Sylvia - I hope things are easier for you now you have moved. Joy - I didn't realise that you were still posting. I haven't seen your name when I've occasionally checked the boards Hope everything is o.k. in your neck of the woods. Are you still dancing? Fly - glad to see you still posting on the daily weather updates thread.

Sometimes it is just nice to read the threads and feel part of something without the need for too much committment at the moment. Life seems to have changed so much in recent years - well since the pandemic really. Sometimes just getting through the day takes all my energy. At the moment I'm on anti-biotics for a recurring infection in my leg so I'm not getting out too much. It's good to "see" all the familiar names.

Kath. x

Hello Kathleen, I certainly remember you, it's so nice to see you posting.

I know exactly how you feel re the loss of your husband, I lost my beloved Jack last year after 57 yrs of marraige plus the 4 years courting years before that & I am soo lost without him.
The house is not the same, my life is not the same without him.

I can only wish you well & that you (with the help of your son) will be able to move on in time.

All the best to you, take care. <3

Joan.

Hello Kathleen, I remember you too. I am sorry to hear you have had such a difficult time and of the loss of your OH <3

2024 was not a happy year for some of us.

Just went back to dancing last week, Kath. <3

Dear All

For Kathleen. <3

For Joy Louise. <3

Welcome back to both of you and very good to see you posting.

Just pop in when you can.

Lots of love
EOS
xx

Hi Kathleen

I remember you too from years ago, when I was plain Duncan.

So sorry to read about your husband and your difficulties,Best Wishes to you