General Chat

Did anyone else have a difficult birth that still upsets them when they are faced with things on TV etc? I was in a socioogy class today that talked about the mother being controlled by medical intervention, I have had 5 C sections, in retrospect i feel were unnessecary as i was made to lie down in my first labour and allowed no mobility, i found i got upset even though it was 18 years ago, anyone else felt this way about such a profound experience? Caz xxx

I thought my first birth could have been easier had I been shown how to use the gas and air properly. 18 1/2 hrs in labour I felt was excessive. I was put in stirrups for the baby about to be forcept out, and I remember thinking noooooooooo so I let it all out big time-normal delivery. .wish it could have been better though. 2nd one was a breeze loved every min of it, I had hardly any pain relief and enjoyed it to be honest -6hrs and I never felt out till the last hour. christmas day too so was perfect in everyway. catherine xx

Hi Caz - no traumatic child-birth stories but I find it extremely difficult to deal with brain surgeries shown on TV & story lines in films/soaps which deal with brain tumours, etc. Thank God I'm ok & been given the all clear but it still haunts me. Ails x

I had an emergency Caesarian 18 years ago due to pre-eclampsia. My baby was taken to another hospital before I was awake from the anaesthetic and I didn't see him for the first time until he was 10 days old. I'm obviously very grateful that both my son and I lived (neither of us were expected to) but both my hubby and I were so emotionally scarred by the whole thing that we couldn't even consider more children. I think it was probably the separation that was more difficult to cope with than the actual birth. I still get very upset when I see or hear of anything related to my experience. Mandy :)

my first 20 yrs ago i was 19 it was horrendous and was told next ones would be ceasers darnt spell ceasarian lol. which 2 nd was 3rd i wanted to try and deliver normal as i was older and felt more in controll, but she had to be born at 35 weeks and i nearly lost her , so not good experiances on any but nothing lasting , just i feel i would of liked to have done something normal.

Both were never ending nightmares which I wouldn't ever want to repeat. I have hideous memories of both the births. Neither were what I had hoped for xx

I feel very fortunate that I had two untraumatic births, could have done without being made to take the gas and air for the first one, but the second was better as I had no pethadine, no gas and air and with both, no stitches. With my second, his cord was wrapped round his neck and the midwife, a lovely black girl, was only delivering her first baby, she was great and as thrilled as I was when he was born (that one was 1967) But, to answer your question caz, I can imagine, if it had been traumatic it would all come back. Ann Glos

Carol Yes, I do still get upset about the birth of my middle daughter, 30 years ago now. I was forced to have an epidural because they said my baby could not stand the stress of a normal labour. When I declined, they shrugged and said, oh well, if you don't mind having another dead baby..(I had had a stillbirth some years before). So of course I caved in. They gave me an epidural and broke my waters - the epidural did not work and my labour did not start, so they put me on a drip. I then had a 21 hour labour without pain relief - no gas and air, cos I had had an epidural, and it was a full on labour right from the start. Two hours before she was born, someone decided to have a proper look and discovered my baby was presenting with her head back instead of forward and down and that is why I couldn't push her out. By the time she was born I couldnt have cared less if I had given birth to a toy tractor - I was so exhausted I couldnt even open my eyes. She had a huge swollen ring of flesh on her face where she had been trying to get out. I always said, if she had been my first, she would have been an only child. OC

Thanks ladies, The birth of my first still comes to me in my dreams as a terrifying experience, he was 9lb 8 oz and posterior, I woke up from the general and was deeply traumatized, have never forgotten that feeling, Caz xxx

My first pregnancy was just so bad, I had 24 hour sickness, couldn't eat or drink, I had a blood test done like they do normally to check for Spinabifida/Downs, the test came back saying that I was carrying a downs syndrome baby, they had me in for counselling and I had to have an amniocentises which came back ok and the baby wasn't a downs syndrome but then I had pre eclampsia/Toxemia, the baby was not growing properly and I went for countless scans, in the end I was induced and had a 17 hour labour, he wouldn't come out and I was put in stirrups and he was ventoused out.........I thought never again !!!!!! Second son was such a breeze, I still had pre eclampsia toward the end and was only sick in the mornings, the labour, well, he was one hour, didn't manage to get to hospital and he was born on the settee at home, he would have been born on the floor if they hadn't had moved me onto the settee LOL LOL!!!!!! 8lb 5oz of baby and only gas and air for pain relief, it was just fab!!!

Joan You made me laugh - by the time I had my last baby, in the same hospital, same ward, same bed practically, I decided this time I was doing it my way, not theirs. I nearly brought the hospital to a standstill by refusing an epidural, a drip, a monitor and everything else. I said that I would tell them when I was ready to give birth. They got the Registrar to me, but I was a woman on a mission, talk about Joan of Arc, lol. I was on the bed on my hands and knees, the Registrar nearly died poor man. I had to sign a disclaimer to say that if anything went wrong, I wouldnt blame the hospital. At that point, I felt ready to push and said so. They said as I had only been in there four hours, I couldnt possibly be ready. So I pushed anyway and out shot my daughter on a nice clean ward bed with no plastic sheet lol. I could literally have got off the bed and scrubbed the ward if they had wanted to - I felt wonderful. I was only supposed to be there for six hours but they kept me in for 24, out of spite I think. We lived literally a stone's throw from the hospital. Oddly enough I didnt have a moment's weepiness with this final baby - after the middle one was born (above) I had the most terrible post natal depression. OC

I have 3 adult children. The first 2 were breech births and I am ever thankful that their arrivals were carefully managed and as natural as possible. They and I received good care from understanding staff and were all fine. I do find it somewhat upsetting that nowadays mothers are almost routinely delivered by Caesarean, if the baby is in a breech position. I understand that the safety of mother and child is paramount but it seems that choice has almost gone, for fear of the hospital being sued. I'm not sure that a Caesarean is necessarily safer. Gwyn

Gwyn - my first baby (almost 13 years ago) was breech & I had to have a caesarean because he was my first & they didn't know whether or not there would have been enough room in my pelvis to allow him to pass through, so they erred on the side of caution - RIGHTLY SO - in case of disasterous results. You can't blame them, because if they had lost me or my son then there would have been court cases, etc. When he was delivered he was only 6lb 4oz (after them saying he was too big to turn) but the umbilical cord was very long, which perhaps had taken up all the room!! My 2nd & 3rd were normal deliveries with no complications - I look back on all of their deliveries rather fondly (is that strange??) & would do any one of them again in a heartbeat!! Ails x