General Chat

He works for a local company, who contract men to work on sites all over the country, my OH was meant to work in the local yard but it hasn't ended up working out that way. I do live in the area I grew up in but most of my friends are still single and don't really have much in common with me anymore. what great ideas, thankyou I will try to get him to arrange for us to meet. He changed his job just before christmas so I haven't met any of them yet, but you never know I might already know some of them. Thanks for your advice and support, I am really grateful Jackiexx

Jackie, do you mean that there are several me who go away each week? Do you think some of the other wives might be lonely too. How about, if your OH is friendly with any of the men, getting him to arrange for you and them to meet for a drink one weekend? Or ask them to yours? Or just ask him if he can put you intouch with them (e mail address if they have a PC would be good. you could then perhaps meet up for coffee and would ahve a support group. Ann glos

Without going into details... Are you saying that a company / firm employs alot of men, who work out of area leaving their families in your vicinity? Do they not have someone who could organise an occasional meet so that the wives could support one another if they wished? Is it not your home area, where you might be able to see old school friends or old work collegues? Is OH working away indefinitely or just for a particular contract? Gwyn

I don't really know anyone round here is the same boat as me, wierd really as all the other wives live around here but we have never met. Will just have to plod along and be happy for my lot in life, thanks for your support Jackiexx

We spent several years with OH working away and returning home Friday evenings. During the week I used to do all the mundane chores like cleaning, household shopping etc. so that weekends were free for family things. We had 3 children so we made a point of doing something altogether on the Saturday, then Sunday off he used to go again. I knew that his life away was much more interesting than life at home but I was happy looking after the children. What WAS more difficult was adjusting to having him around alot more, when that part of his job changed. It would be silly things that got to me.- like me hurrying to wash up after tea so that I could watch a particular programme on TV only to find that he had changed channels and was watching something else.A bit of discussion soon sorted this. I made a point of refering the children to ask their Dad about things. They had been so used to me making all midweek decisions. Do you feel trapped? Is there anyone nearby who could share some time and perhaps outings with you? Gwyn

Jackie would you be interested in some penpals? I'll let you have my addy if you are. My hubby used to go away quite a lot with a previous job, but my children were younger then and kept me very busy. He does ocassionally go away now, but only for a few days at a time. Heather x

Hi Jackie, Now that we are retired it doesn't happen any more. However, most of our married life until we had been married for 38 years was punctuated by OH being absent for from one week to 6 months at a time. firstly because he was in the RN then he worked for a firm whose head office was in Rochester NY USA so spent weeks at a time there. All I can say Jackie is that if you love each other and you have a strong marriage, you will survive. what I never could make him understand was how hard it is for wives left behind to cope with the loneliness (And I didn't have anything like this board to come on and chat). I am afraid you have to make a life for yourself, not so bad when you have children but it does get hard once they leave home, I suppose it is why I ended up with so many hobbies. Before the internet I used to belong to several correspondence magazines (lots of letters circulating in one folder) that was where we all let off steam. You can do it on here, we will all listen. I also lived away from my family which didn't help. So I do sympathise with you, just remember we are here. and please feel free to PM me if you want to. Lorraine, sometimes, if you want a decent standard of living you just have to cope ----it is what we ladies do!!! (((((hugs)))))) Ann glos

jackie i wouldnt be able to cope , is it possible he could not work away its really hard when this happens love puss xx

I can't go with him, the kids need to go to school and I have no family to look after them. It seems I see him long enough to do his washing then he is off again.

Jackie never had this problem as we used to work together 24/7.Now he works 6 nights a week while I stay in and sometimes that gets to me. I do feel for you, can you not go with him sometimes ?? Jac

Some of you know my OH works away alot. Do any of you have any experiance of this? It is really starting to get to me now that he is hardly ever here, I really love him but him being away all the time is really hurting me. Jackie