General Chat

Haven't heard that one Nell lol nudged for the morning shift

Postie Paul I think that's the idea behind this song by Jake Thakray: -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- He was a fine upstanding bantam cock So brisk and stiff and spry With a springy step and a jaunty plume And a purposeful look in his eye In his little black laughing eye there was... I took him to the coop and introduced him to Me seventeen wild eyed hens He upped and he tupped as a hero tups He bowed to them all and then He upped and he tupped 'em all again... And then upon the peace of me ducks and me geese He rudely did intrude With a glazed eye and open mouth They bore him with fortitude And a little bit of gratitude... He jumped me giggling guinea fowl He thrust his attentions upon Me twenty hysterical turkeys and A visiting migrant swan And the bantam thundered on... He ravaged me fan tailed pigeon and Me lily white columbine And as I was locking up me budgerigar He jumped me parrot from behind Who was sitting on me shoulder at the time... Then all of a sudden with a gasp and a wheeze He clasped his wings to his head Lay flat on the ground with his feet in the air Me bantam cock lay dead And the vultures circled overhead they did... What a noble bird, what a champion cock What a way to live and to die I was digging him a grave to save his bones From the hungry buzzards in the sky When the bantam opened up a sly little eye... He gave me a wink and a terrible grin The way that rapists do He said you see them big daft buggers up there They'll be down in a minute or two They'll be down in a minute or two Transcribed by Michael Spiritos. Sadly you don't hear Jake's suggestive dark voice while reading. nell

Now that is Brill!! pmsl Kim xx

Well Kenny the rooster costs a lot of money, but the farmer decides he'd be worth it. So, he buys Kenny. The farmer takes Kenny home and sets him down in the barnyard, but first he gives the rooster a pep talk. 'I want you to pace yourself now. You've got a lot of chickens to service here, and you cost me a lot of money. Consequently, I'll need you to do a good job. So, take your time and have some fun,' the farmer said, with a chuckle. Kenny seemed to understand, so the farmer pointed toward the Hen house and Kenny took off like a shot. WHAM! - Kenny nails every hen in the hen house three or four times, and the farmer is really shocked. After that the farmer hears a commotion in the duck pen. Sure enough, Kenny is in there. Later, the farmer sees Kenny after a flock of geese, down by the lake. Once again - WHAM! He gets all the geese. By sunset he sees Kenny out in the fields chasing quail and pheasants. The farmer is distraught and worried that his expensive rooster won't even last 24 hours. Sure enough, the farmer goes to bed and wakes up the next day, to find Kenny on his back, stone cold in the middle of the yard, vultures are circling overhead. The farmer, saddened by the loss of such a colourful and expensive animal, shakes his head and says, 'Oh, Kenny, I told you to pace yourself. I tried to get you to slow down, now look what you've done to yourself.' Kenny opens one eye, nods toward the vultures circling in the sky and says, 'Shhh, they're getting closer'.

a Joke....nearly (0: