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Please moderate the Find Living Relatives board

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ProfilePosted byOptionsPost Date

Joy Kentish Maid

Joy Kentish Maid Report 27 Apr 2012 16:06

Please moderate this board in the same way as the success board..

Many of us love to help others in their research. However, it is of great concern to me when I read such as "my Dad is ..... please help me find him", and read that birth etc details of the "Dad" have been sent to the seeker. None of us reading know whether the "Dad" is aware of the existence of the seeker, and I am unhappy that this board is not moderated.

Other readers may have different views from mine, but I wanted to express my concern and my wish for the posts to be moderated before they appear in the public board because looking for living people can be a very sensitive issue.

Rambling Rose

Rambling Rose Report 27 Apr 2012 16:34

I agree with Joy's suggestion that posts should be moderated before is too late when information has already been given out in public, and we have all seen personal details remaining in the header when the post itself has been reported but not yet deleted.

It is perfectly obvious that many new members do NOT read the guidelines before posting.

I would also like to draw your attention to this comment on your FB page:

"Also bear in mind the information you post can be found in any search engine, so only share details that you wouldn't mind other people seeing."

Shouldn't that also read

'Only share details that the person you are seeking wouldn't mind other people seeing "?

I would suggest that mention of adultery, criminal past, number of partners might be something that they would not wish plastered online for all to see ...especially when these 'facts' may be wholly unsubstantiated, as may the parentage itself unless confirmed by the person being sought.


KenSE Report 27 Apr 2012 18:27

The trouble is that if that board is moderated then the other boards will get used instead. So all boards will need to be moderated.

Rambling Rose

Rambling Rose Report 27 Apr 2012 18:43

Quite probably KenSE, as some do now... but if GR moderates that one board, which is where 99% of the new members drawn in by L L Family go first, at least it would throw out a clear sign that the way posts are worded is important.


DazedConfused Report 27 Apr 2012 19:40

We never had this problem until the boards were 'amended' and the Find Living Relatives appeared.

There are also similar incidents occurring on the Facebook page as well.

Then there is the problem as to whether those looking for relatives are genuine.

Must agree with Joy though, this is a very tricky situation


SylviaInCanada Report 27 Apr 2012 19:43

This is a really tricky situation

But far too much personal information is being posted ............... and that needs to be sorted out before GR is sued by someone!


GlitterBaby Report 27 Apr 2012 23:43

Am I right in thinking that the Success Board posts were "delayed" before they appeared ?

If that was the case, or might still be, then surely that can be done on the Find Living Relatives Board.

So yes a good idea


jax Report 28 Apr 2012 00:09

I dont think the Success board is delayed nor moderated as there are so few posts on there it would not take long to read through them each morning.

The Spam ones were posted a while back and it was down to us the "paying members" to report them


GlitterBaby Report 28 Apr 2012 00:12

Had forgotten that


SylviaInCanada Report 28 Apr 2012 01:39


Yes, the posts on the Success Board were delayed before posting. The guidelines used to say something like "deferred for 24 hours for monitoring".

In practice, it was usually between 1 and 4 days before a post appeared on the board ......... and they often arrived in batches!



jax Report 28 Apr 2012 01:46

So why did we get all those weird ones in the early hours? plus there have been a couple that were not quite complementry about what they had found.

Maybe it all changed when they did the makeover...The emails that informed us a post/thread had been rr'd certainly did


SylviaInCanada Report 28 Apr 2012 03:44


I think they stopped moderating posts on the Success board when they made all the changes last August

I certainly remember looking at the board up to the middle of last year and seeing no new posts for days, then there would be several appearing all at once.

IF they had been holding posts for moderating, those strange advertising ones would never have appeared!



Guinevere Report 28 Apr 2012 08:08

I also think the board should be moderated. I'm horrified to see the full names of people posted on a board that google can find very easily.

Some birth mothers would not welcome contact for very good reason. I have a friend in that position. She managed to get her life together after a lot of therapy and now has a happy life with a loving family. None of them know about the baby she gave up for adoption. If she told them about the child she would have to tell them how it was conceived and the circumstance were horrific.

She has a right to the privacy she was promised when she chose adoption over abortion.



SylviaInCanada Report 28 Apr 2012 22:20


That's a horrifying story

and just one of the many reasons why I will not help to find living relatives .................... I put myself in the place of the mother and wonder how I would feel.



Guinevere Report 29 Apr 2012 09:41

I won't either, Sylvia.

My understanding is that there is a register where birth mothers can add their names if they would welcome contact. Surely that's where those seeking should go first, rather than a website open to the world.

If women were promised privacy that promise should be kept, no matter what the circumstances of conception. Unless the mothers register that they would like to be found.



GlitterBaby Report 29 Apr 2012 11:43

Really does need some feedback from the Team


SylviaInCanada Report 29 Apr 2012 21:18

well, it is the weekend

can't expect them to do anything before Monday morning 8:30 am, can we?

:-P :-P


Reggie Report 29 Apr 2012 21:47

As early as that, Sylvia?

On a serious note, I agree wholeheartedly with the views expressed about the content of many of the posts on the FLR board, and the need for something to be done about it.

The potential for causing distress - if not actual harm - is immeasurable.


SylviaInCanada Report 29 Apr 2012 23:15


actually, Reggie ............... I have to admit that most of my responses from GR on a Monday arrive in the late afternoon, but before 4:30 pm

I have assumed that they have been dealing with much more important matters before that, so I like to give them the benefit of the doubt :-D

coffee, tea or .............?????

Joy Kentish Maid

Joy Kentish Maid Report 30 Apr 2012 14:50

Please, Genes Reunited, give this serious matter your urgent attention with a positive response. This public site has been flooded recently with details of a personal nature.