General Chat

stacey love its them that have the problem, the only way it seems that they can make themselfs feel good about themselfs is to try and pull you down to there levell be strong and show them size or looks dosnt matter stand tall and ignore its whats inside that counts xxx

The last few days I've felt really good about myself and have had a completely different personality. I'm usually a large girl with low self esteem and no confidence but that hadn't been the case lately (well apart from the large girl can't change that in a few days! lol). Until last night when two people basically said that they wouldn't go any where near me. I've know these two for over a year and thought that they had seen me for who I really am. But after their comments I feel like sh*t. I know I'm not slim and gorgeous but thought someone actually thought I was pretty. It's not even that I like them like that or would go out with either of them but it was just nice to think that finally things had started to look up. Sorry to moan I just feel like I want to hide in a dark hole. Sx

Racey - if people say or think things like that then they aren't worth wasting energy over; who do they think they are?! Hold your head up high girl, rise above it and just be proud of who YOU are. Love and light Sylvx

I agree with Puss Stacey,these two saaad people have a problem,not you .it's their loss not yours ,my sister in law is humongous i kid you not ,but what a lovely person she is,which goes to prove ,it's not the outer you that counts ,but the inner.Fred.

Stacey, some people like to hang around others with low self esteem, and who they think are not as pretty/lively/intellectual as they are.....in order to make themselves feel better....it actually says more about these friends of yours, and their shallowness.... If I can read between the lines, you have felt better, and have shown a side of yourself that is more confident and outgoing....if this is the case it may well be that they feel threatened by this budding swan who is appearing, and it is in their interests to keep you feeling unsure about yourself, or your appearance.... You can do one of two things.....either hide away and lick your wounds.....or come out, show these friends that this side of you is staying, and their words cannot sting you.... I may not be putting it across properly, and if this is meaningless to you, please ignore.....

Sally, no your words are not meaningless at all. Thank you all for your kind words, I just feel that this was the last time I can be knocked down and get up without feeling naff. I've been bullied and made to feel naff all my life and it doesn't seem to have changed in my adult life either. I'm trying to lose weight but it doesn't seem to want to budge. I like to have unusual colours in my hair but I can't help to think that if it was a normal colour and I dressed like everyone else then maybe it would help. Don't get me wrong I don't wear weird and colourful clothes, I just mean I wear wide leg jeans and well just different things to my friends. Sx

stacey this is the point they see you with having a mind of your own and belive people get jealous because they havent got the bottle to look different why be like everyone else, the way i look at it is if there talking about you they must find you interesting i used to dress as a punk one week/hippy the next, and thats what people would say oh i wish i could do that , do what you want and be who you want, and remember you always have yourself no one can take that away from you you have feelings which these bullies obviosly dont, and you have us why dont you come to one of our meets xxx love puss xx

Hi Stacey Its their loss not yours they are not worth the trouble.. Why should you change the way you are for somone thats not right at all. You love the way you dress and colour your hair, it makes you happy to do that. Love is about loving for who you are not what you want to be for someone else. Be yourself and you will shine...

I'm not brave enough to do that puss, I'm a really shy person when I haven't met people before. And knowing me I'd start to feel really nervous and sick and get there but not able to come in. I'm not good with things like that, but thank you I do appreciate all the lovely comments people have given me. I know other people can't really help me until I help myself so I guess I've just got to get myself to that point. Thank you, Sx

stacey, i was also very nervous , and i no what nervousness you are talking about, when i went to my first meet. i am having a quiet house warming one on sat, ive only met one of the girls but the ones that are coming are some of the nicest people i have chatted to on here if you want to come i will do anything i can to get you here, and i guarantee you will have fun xxx please pm if you want to chat love lorraine xxxx

Stacy from one big gal to another.....those who have upset you are too far up their own backsides. One day they will meet a slim pretty plaything to hang off their arms, they will fall for her hook line and sinker...then she will dump them for someone who has a personality. Their time will come, what goes around and all that. Your time will come. You have to kiss a few frogs to find your prince, and believe me, he's out there. It always happens when you are not looking. you wont be on your own forever, dont settle for second best. it happened to me, and it will happen to you. I was with someone from the age of 16. He cheated on me when I was 19, I forgave him, we split up when I was 24. All my mates were part of couples, my best mate was married and had kids. I thought everyone would be taken and no one would want me. Had a couple of dates which were a no no, then went to a wedding a year later. got together with David and bobs yer uncle, Fanny's yer aunt, almost 17 years later, married with 2 kids and still happy. Had I stayed with one of those frogs, I wouldnt be happy now...im sure of it. Be yourself, wear what you want to, be individual, dye your hair, be fun....be racy....be who you are and celebrate that fact you are you. Elaine x

Stacey You can change the way you think to fit in with others but trust me you would be more unhappy than you are now!! Just be you, you are young enough to have time on your hands to meet people that are genuine rather than sad people that go for looks only!!! Once you start liking yourself, then others will too!! xx

Hi i am too a larger lady!! Who has been happily married for 6 years. My husband loves me the way i am and says the weight is something i have to choose to lose. They are just very petty people who need reminded that you can lose weight easily at any point you wish to but they wont have a chance of changing the people they are inside. People tend to pick on people and make snide comments when they have a low esteem themselves. Its your life do what you want and just remember 2 people arent the only people you will meet in life.

Hi Stacey, You are you, an individual. On here, we have not met you and you come over as a little shy but with a very nice character. You are one of our 'babies', i.e. one of our younger members, a breath of fresh air to some of us oldies (I am 66). I love talking to you about card making, scrap booking. You have a great personality. You will find someone who likes you for who you are inside. The ones who spoke of you so disparagingly are not worth bothering about, ignore them, keep smiling and youw ill find someone when youa re not looking. Not sure which part of the country you live in but do try and get to a meet. If you are shy, someone will arrange to meet you earlier and go with you. Lots of peple have been shy at their first meets so we always understand. Ann Glos

A ((((HUG)))) for you Stacey Heather x

Stacey luv Having a wee 'woman's moment' of my own - can't find the right words for you just now but wanted to send you some (((hugs))) xxx

Hi Stacey It's hard to be cheerful when someone's words are like a slap in the face, but try to keep your chin up. I hope that the messages on here will help you feel better soon. Love Mandy :) x

Stacey Don't let them get to you-there not worth it. You always come across as a lovely girl with a great personality, some people like nothing better to do then to get at people. Ignore them, hold your head high, be glad that you don't need to stoop to their level. ((((((hugs)))))) catherine xx

Awwwwwww Stacey sending (((((hugs))))) to you love. Try and rise above it hon I know it's hard but you clearly deserve more and you always get back what you give in the long run I am a firm believer in that. Good things are coming to you I am sure of it. Chin up chickxx

Hi Stacey, As you dont say if these two are male or female,,,so we'll presume male,,,,,,,what gives them them the preconcieved idea that you would have accepted them anyway,?perhaps they needed telling you are aiming your standards a little higher,,,thank you,,,,,,,,,forget about size,,,,,, ,look inside and see the real you,,,,,,,,,somebody is just waiting to find someone just like you ----just as you are,