General Chat

I took my mother who is 85yrs young to our local hospital today. We have been back and forth for the past 6months. She was promised a op (well before Xmas) but is going in next Mon for a knee replacement . She has arthritis of the spine ,both hips and both knees.She has never been in hospital for a major op before, and today the !!!!! anaesthetist put the fear of God in her, he went on and on about during /after the op, that there was a 1 in 3 chance of putting her on a life support mashine, because she has asthma ,we were there 3hrs in and out the same room /dr 3 times. Then and only then did I cotton on that he will not even be at the op ,but some one else. Also that he hadnt even looked at her x/ray/ asthma report from Fri , after words he sent for these and back tracked, to late the damage was done, my poor mother. He was now saying it was now 9 out of a hundred, my head was now hurting ,so god only knows how poor mum felt.Im so tired ,fustrated,uptight p''''''of, and its not me having the op. Sorry about the moan, and by the way ,this is my first posting and my well be my last. AHHHHHHHHH

Isn't she having it done by epidural? My hip replacement will be. Give her my love will you, I only have it on one hip, and thats bad enough.

I think all surgeons have to mention the problems at operations nowadays. My daughter who is only 27 is to have major hip operation in May and the surgeon said he needed the vascular team in theatre, he may cut a nerve etc but if she doesn`t get op maybe wheelchair bound sooner as her hips are like a 70 year olds, Ros

I'll add to that, my mum had her hip done jsut over a year ago, she has asthma, and had the epidural. They give you a sleeping tablet, so yuo don't have the grogginess of general, and she was fine, only a bit wheezy thats all.

Frankie firstly welcome. I think a lot of these doctors anaethistists need to go back to school to learn how to relate to people. Hope you and your mum are ok and that all goes well on Monday

hiya frankie, awwww your poor mum, and you, some people have the brains of a rocking horse!, hope all goes well for your mum, plz give her this ((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))) x

Yep she is having it done by epidural that was why I was so angry.As it makes all the difference. And Im a layman/woman

Ros, I'm 47 and my consultant was really brutally honest with me, told me all the risks from infection, the fact that if he has to replace this replacement, it will be the last one and I will be in a wheelchair, of if it gets infected, I will be worse off than I am now blah blah. I think they are covering themselves so that we go into this with our eyes fully open. Still, its very scary for an 85 year old, poor love. Frankie, can she talk to someone else who has had it done? That will help I am sure.

Frankie I dread old age. No one really cares like they used to in hospitals. My dear wife says she will never go back into a hospital after her treatment a year or so ago. We are fast approaching my opinion of future life when old people become an unbearable burden - 'How old are Sir, 70, there's the blue door, go right in Sir, You will not feel a thing' Righ or wrong?

My daughter`s having a hip re-aligment -not done in UK very often so team from USA coming over to supervise surgeon, Ros

I don't think this had anything to do with her age. I really do think the NHS has a policy of brutal honesty....if they tell us what the risks are, and we still go for it, we can't sue them.

Hope both you and mum are feeling a little better now that you are home. Have a cup of tea or something stronger you both need it after such a frustrating day. Best of luck for you both on Monday. You'll both be in my thoughts and prayers. Beryl x

Hope your Mum`s op. goes well , Ros xxx

As I just said this is my first post!I was feeling so alone and upset for mum. Thank you one and all for taking the time and trouble to respond, its made my night! THANK YOU Frankie

Frankie, though what they said is frightening, I am sure she will be fine. Although this is major surgery, it is still pretty much routine. She will feel so much better after. My mum said though she was very sore after her op, it was the scar that hurt. The hip was fine, and it was great to be able to walk without that gnawing pain. It'll be the same with her knee. Welcome to the boards, nice to see new posters, and hope we see you again. Do let us know how it goes.

Frankie welcome to the gen board. Sorry to hear about the bad experience for your Mum at the hospital.. I do hope all goes well for her op. Will be thinking of her, and you. Look forward to seeing you make more postings on here. Ann glos

Hi Frankie and welcome, Hope your mum will be okay. With any luck, by now someone will have reassured her - perhaps someone else who has had the same op or has the same breathing problems. My mum is 77, also has bad asthma, and had her Gallbladder removed last July. I had many good wishes from the people on here - I know there can be a lot of negativity on here but 90% are good people and rally round. Each time my mother has been in hospital she has made at least one new friend and has always 'enjoyed' - for want of a better word! - her time there (apart from pain etc). So hopefully your mum will get a wee bit of pampering and have new people to talk to - just as you have new people to talk to tonight! Tomorrow is another day - keep us posted! Christine

Frankie, That is an awful way to treat your mum!! Having said that - she's not alone. My 56 year young BIL was diagnosed with mesothelioma - the most serious form of asbestosis in October. Transpires the chest x-rays that were taken 14 months previously as a check had never been developed. His consultant then went on to say, amongst other 'gems' that he had 3 months to live, and he should give up the anti-depressants he had been taking for years (due to an adverse reaction to a pain killer he takes), and go for a swim instead!!!! He also said there was nothing to be done. Good time to tell him to give up the anti-depressants don't you think?? Luckily he saw a Macmillan doctor in November who had a great sense of humour and asked what God looked like - after all a consultant cannot and should not state length of life as a definite!! He persuaded BIL to take his anti-depressants, and , unlike the consultant, suggested ways of coping with the pain and what treatment was available to alleviate the symptoms - so that he could live a life - albeit a sedate one - instead of living a death. Well, it's January and BIL's still here. Not too well at the moment as he and my sister have had this horrendous flu-type bug. We're living in hope that he will see his first grandchild born in April. However, that consultant will never be forgiven by our family for giving my sister and BIL no hope. Yes we know BIL will die sooner than later, but he had the attitude that as he was going to die, there wasn't any point in wasting time on him. I do hope your mum can see someone else before her op - someone with a proper 'bedside manner' and a little respect and feeling!!! Take care maggie

Hi Frankie My mum has had several operations in recent years and I've noticed that patients are given much more information nowadays about what to expect and the risks involved. I'm not sure if it's patient care or if it's something to do with negligence cases. Best of luck to your mum with her operation, I hope it all goes well. Heather

Yes, I am sure it has something to do with 'being sued' after a number of people sued after their operation went wrong, saying they 'werent told the risks'. I had a very minor eye procedure a few years ago and practically fainted after the anaesthetist explained that there was a possibility that I could go blind 'if the Surgeon's knife slips'. I very nearly didnt have the op. I believe Health Authorities are now obliged to produce and publish League tables, which give percentages for various ops. You could try phoning your local Health Trust and asking them, if you want to put your mind at rest. OC