General Chat

I went to the pictures the morrow I got a front seat at the back A friend gave me some toffee I ate it and gave her it back. Someone fell from the pit to the gallery And broke a front bone in their back. Where did they get them from!!! Mau ;O)))))))

Marion and Germaine As children we used to sing Desperate Dan ( from the comic) to that one. lol

Ed, I have never come across anyone else who knows that one - even my parents can't remember telling it to me. Any idea where it comes from?

Marion - have you 'cleaned up' skinny malinky or was I just crude lol Our version went When the picture started Skinny Malinky f*rted and fell through a hole in the seat. maggie

Follow on for Maureen at the Coast... I went round a straight crooked corner, And saw a dead donkey die .. And sadly I do not remember the rest

Little birdie flying high, Dropped his message from the sky, Angry farmer wiped his eye, B.....dy good job that cows don't fly!!!

If I had a donkey and he wouldn't go Would a smack him? No No No! I'd put him in a barn with lots of corn And rub his old belly 'til his bum got warm! In days of old, when men were bold and the bricklayers had no water There came a little bird and did a little turd and the bricklayers had some mortar. That was about as rude as my Gran got. LOL Mags xx

Could I have that threepenny bar of chocolate for tuppence. I,ve only a penny and I,ve lost it. Happy days

A Valetines card ode: I think about you constantly You'r always on my mind I'd like to park my pushbike In the cheeks of your............... More daft stuff I went to the pictures tomorrow and took a front seat at the back A lady gave me a banana I ate it and gave her it back.

Another Valentine Ditty Christopher..... I love you, I love you my passion most mighty, I wish my pyjamas were next to your nightie.. Now don't be mistaken ....And don't be misled.. 'Cos I mean on the clothes line, And not on the bed!!!

Rosemay Take a tip from one who knows tie your nightie to your toes

Rosemay Take a tip from one who knows tie your nightie to your toes

my father in laws fav was Not last night but the night before 10 tommy cats came knocking at my door I went downstairs to let them in they hit me on the head with a rolling pin the rolling pin was made of glass they picked me up and kicked my a**!! Claire lol

Strictly speaking, this is a limerick but I'm on the second can of lager so am throwing caution to the winds. There was a young man from Rhyl Who swallowed a hydrogen pill His sexual organ was found in Glamorgan and his nuts on a tree in Brazil.

I'd never heard 'Dan, Dan, the funny wee man' or 'Skinny Malinkey Longlegs' until my grandaughter sang them to me. Her 80 year old Irish great grandmother had taught them to her! Maybe they are Celtic rhymes and not for the 'delicate' ears of a Sarf Lonnoner! LOLOL My Dad used to sing this one to my kids (although he always blamed my brother!) :- Auntie Mary had a canary Up the leg of her drawers. When she f*rted It departed Now let's have a round of applause. Another of his favourites was:- Little Robin Redbreast sat upon a pole Opened his hairy legs and whistled up his Old Mother Reilly had a fat cow She wanted to milk it but didn't know how. She pulled it's tail instead of it's t*t And all she got was a bucket of Ships on the ocean made of glass I saw a Chinaman sliding on his Ask no questions, tell no lies I saw a policeman doing up his Flies are a nuisance, bugs are worse That is the end of my little verse. Sue xx

i've never felt a piece of felt that felt the same as that felt felt when i felt the felt of that felt hat! i ulalused to plalalay my olalold banjolalo and selalet it olalon my kneelelelele but nowlalow the strilalings have brolaloken dowlalown its nolalo more ulalused to melalelele i selalent it tolalo the melalenders sholalop to seelalee what helalee could dolaloolooloo he sailaled the strilalings have brolaloken dowlalown its nolalo more ulalused to youlaloolooloo. i am willing to interpretate if needed.

Aaah delicate Sue from Langley Vale Your delicate ears bring me to shame The delicate word from your sainted grandmother And you from Sarf London TELL ME ANOTHER.

Marion our version went Skinny malinky lang legs umberella feet roound knees like baw bees an he couldna run doon the street Mrs White had a fright in the middle of the night saw a ghost eating toast sitting up a lamp post Norah

Old Mother Hubbard, Went to the cupboard, To get herself a hankie, And when she got there the cupboard was bare, And so was her daughter with a Yankee...

Think I'm getting the hang of this now, perhaps am a poet but didn't know it. Oh Babydoll how do you suffer You'r Banjo's broke, no more to utter. It's sad to see the poor wee thing just for the sake of another G String.