General Chat

Stephen I understood all that . Lol you should really put a little water with it makes the whisky go further and you wont slurr you speech. Lol
your be too far gone to shovel tomorrow snow ?
Pauline are you still deep in snow or is it melting.
Pat you want to hurry up with your christmas shopping there will be nothing left soon.

I think Dermot has asked the Russians over here.? He must be very mean saying he would not have got married if they had invented Electric blankets before he got married . the thing is, wives usualy last longer then electric blankets. and they dont need to have a check out every two year. whereas blankets do. .and I would like to see an electric blanket. do his washing, cook his meals do the ironing make him a cup of tea when he was ill. and give him little comforts. lol

Rita

Rita,

Can you lead the singing ?

PS
Where can I find a wife that will do all those things ?

Rita,
I'll do some more Chrissy pressie shopping tomorrow!
i shall have to start writing my cards as well
i saw a little bit of Eastenders a couple of months ago when Peggy Mitchell left. I'd much rather watch Poirot or Miss Marple!

STEPHEN
I think you have already found one. Dermot is pushing the boat out with his complaints.

OPEN THE DOOR DERMOTS WIFE AND PUSH HIM OUT IN THE COLD.
Rita

Especially for Stephen & anyone else who drinks whisky - without an 'E'.

Apologies if you have read this one before.

I had 12 bottles of whisky in my cellar that my wife instructed me to empty. She said, "Empty each and every bottle down the sink." So, I reluctantly proceeded with the dreadful task.

I withdrew the cork from the first bottle and poured the contents down the sink, with the exception of one glass which I drank.

I extracted the cork from the second bottle and did likewise, with the exception of one glass which I drank. I then withdrew the cork from the third bottle and poured the contents down the sink, with the exception of one glass which I drank.

I pulled the cork from the fourth sink, poured the bottle down the glass, which I drank. I pulled the bottle from the cork of the next, and drank one sink out of it and threw the rest down the glass. I pulled the sink out of the glass and poured the cork from the bottle.

Then I corked the sink with the glass, bottled the drink, and drank the pour. When I had everything emptied, I steadied the house with one hand, counted the bottles, corks, glasses, and sinks with the other, which were 29, and put the houses in one bottle, which I drank.

I'm not under the affluence of incohol, but thinke peep I am. I'm not half so thunk as you might drink. I fool so feelish I don't know who is me, and the drunker I stand here the longer I get.

Dermot,

That ones a classic........always makes me smile .

what song do you want ?." The wandering Minstrel Boy "? lol
or a sailors one with cleaned up words.? I could start you off with

" My Brother Sylvest he had a row of thirty medals on his chest
Big chest " I wont go on it was a party song sung by some of the marines in the family
or we could all do excercise with this one " Sons of the sea all British born sailing the ocean bobbing up and down like this ."


Rita

I think Dermot needs all that whisky to keep him warm when he's pushed outside in the cold!
Myself, I'm nice and warm with the gas fire flaming away.
off to bed soon!
Catch you tomorrow x

Dermot I had not heard that one . that is one I must try and copy for this Chrstmas that should bring a smile to the faces of those who like a little drink,

Rita

Good News !

Forecast.....NO SNOW.....well not on my patch anyway.

Don't mind very low temperatures.....I wear thermals and a few layers of good lightweight wool.
Gotta keep the wooly hat on though......I've a Humpty Dumpty head.

Night all.

Morning everyone, breakfast is just about ready,

(_)? (_)? (_)>(_)? (_)? (_)?
\_/> \_/> \_/> \_/> \_/> \_/>

bacon, sausage, poached or scrambled eggs.
mushrooms, tomatoes, beans.

\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\
toast. honey. marmalade.
food on the hotplate, please help yourselves.


Hope you all have a good day,
take care and stay safe and warm.
Jean xx

Morning Jean, I am so pleased to read your good news and hope all will stay well in the future for you. You deserve good things happening in your life. Big hug for you!

I see that MommyC was the one passing on a runny nose, I have had a stinker of a cold for several days now, couldn't understand where it came from as I hadn't been out since Monday 29th cos I was worried about falling on the ice again. I wonder if it would have been worse had I not had the flu jab earlier in November.

The mention of Poinsettias made me remember my first Christmas name on the boards in 2005, it was Purple Poinsettia and there is one too, I think it's called Christmas Pudding. My Mum was good with poinsettias, she would have them on her living room window sill, not double glazed but a warm room, and at night would cover them with a black bin bag, they lasted for ages and flowered often. When she died I had no where I could put them that was warm enough so a cousin's son took them, amid a lot of other stuff he took, her budgie and cage, and furniture - I think now he probably sold most of the things, he turned out to be a bad lot. Left his wife and two little girls and owed a lot of people money.

I hope everyone stays well and no falls on the ice if you go out. It's not too bad here in Norfolk at the mo except bally cold but more snow forecast I think later in the week. Haven't even started my Cards yet and only got a few pressies, can't get in the mood at all.

take care all,
love
Lizxxxx

Morning all.

Hi Liz, haven't seen you for a while, hope you're keeping well........you're up late.

Bet you had a good sleep last night Jean, thanks for the lovely breakfast.

Maddie, I think the only people on this thread who drink (apart from you) are Marilyn and myself, oh, and Sue when she's around. Don't know about Pat or Dermot, do you drink Pat?

I know Shelly, Mo and Linda never touch the stuff ..........such good girls!

Rita and Stephen (and I think Jean) only have a drink on a special occasion, not sure about Yvonne or Lady.

I get the feeling we'd never be able to work out if Dermot was drunk or sober ..........LOL

Stephen, you were spot on............women don't like drunken men!!

LOL at Rita's reply to Dermot's post about his marriage ...........and then at Stephen's PS to Rita.

Morning everyone.
Jean I can't tell you how thrilled I am at your good news, yippeee.
The breakfast is lovely, thanks for scrambled eggs and toast, it was lovely
to get here before it all went cold. I am never normally here till late, so I miss out on all the goodies.
The news is a lovely early christmas present for us all. Onwards and upwards now my love.

Nobody missed me last night, boo hoo. I was at darts,and we won 4-2 and 2-1. When we left the house there was freezing fog outside,we had to drive extra slowly as it was so dangerous .

Have a good day everyone, take care if you have to go out to work,also those of us who are retired,stay warm and cosy indoors. Luv Mo xxx

My God Mo, never seen you on the thread at this time, did you wet the bed?

We posted at the same time.


Edit: Well done at the darts.

Morning All !

Thanks for the breakfast Jean.....good for my waistline !

Cold out last night and even colder this morning -13C. Glad I'm not a Brass Monkey. And if anyone wonders where that saying came from....it's an old Naval one.

No more snow thank goodness....the shovel needs a rest.

Getting the skis out later to go to the Village shop for a couple of things. And anyway it's gonna be a lovely bright morning and I want to play in the snow.

Mrs Stephens car is due it's MOT but the garage I go to is snowed in, so no can do. Better get her a sleigh and a couple of reindeer.

Have a good day ya all.....catch you later.

Good moning everyone. it is cold but no snow O perhaps I should not have said that ?
Stephen those poor reindeer.s have so much work a head of them with Santa doing his rounds. see if you can get some Husky dogs to pull her Sleigh instead. it will be fun for her and the dogs will go walkies.

Jean I can see your on top of the world this morning you are up early and already cooking for everyone. you can walk about and whistle now. not too loud as those Husky might pull Mrs Stephens away from him and he wont like that ?

Marilyn must be home now ? well at the airport they will be going through her cases to see all the goodies she brought back with her.

Pauline Mo is too excited to see what Marilyn has brought her back I think she brought her some warm in in her suit case.

Pauline hope your have a day with no more snow ? your beable to go out and Brent will beble to go to his day centre.

see you later

morning all

so good jean about your new well done xxxx

pauline now who is weeing the bed darty mear will now have to clean it up lol

dermot i dont like eastenders as well thay need to bring the progran up to date in to the rill world

Morning everyone, hope we are all warm and well.

Jean must be walking on air this morning. Lovely.

Very clear and crisp this morning. At least I can see to the end of the road this morning. lol

Gonna put me shoes on and take Charlie out for a pee. Then off to work.

I think this thread is being divided by the drinkers and non-drinkers. We are social drinkers and are being blasted as dipsomaniacs. pmsl

Stay safe out there.

See you later.

'Dipso' Maniacs ?

I thought they were folk who went swimming in all weathers.